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Part 2 Dealing with Others  Click Here To Reading Part-1 1 Be honest and open. What have you got to hide? We're all imperfect, growing, learning human beings. If you feel ashamed or insecure about any aspect of yourself and you feel that you have to hide those parts of you, whether physically or emotionally then you have to come to terms with that and learn to convert your so-called flaws into individualistic quirks or simply as basic, down-to-earth acknowledgments of your own imperfections.     Try the tactic of owning up to your imperfections mid-argument with someone. You will often discover that suddenly you've removed the very reason for stubbornly holding the line of argument, which is often about preserving face and not giving in. The moment you say, "Yeah, look, I get really irritable when the room's in a mess too. And I acknowledge that I shouldn't leave my clothes in a pile on the floor and yet I do it because that's a lazy part of myself I

"Be yourself" is quite possibly the most commonly used phrase in the history of individualist-based advice. Be yourself. It's such a vague adage. What does it really mean, to be yourself? And is it really as easy as it sounds? With the steps below, it can be. Part 1 Discovering Who You Are 1 Find yourself and define yourself on your terms. Oscar Wilde once said with his usual wit: Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. As humorous as this might seem, it's a basic summation of the truth. Yet, you can't be yourself if you don't know, understand, and accept yourself first. It should be your primary goal to find this out.     Find the time to learn upon what you value and take time to consider what makes up the essence of who you are. As part of this, contemplate your life and choices. Try to think about what kinds of things you would or wouldn't like to do, and act accordingly; finding out through trial and error helps more than you might think it do

We have all had experiences where we felt like a fish out of water, or we were swimming against the current. Things were just not going well (or as well as we would like) and we had to stop, reevaluate, and regroup. Chances are, many of these situations are the result of unrealistic expectations you had of yourself. No matter how much you plan, how many team members you have, how great your ideas are, or how much capital you have, you could face disappointment and failure if you are not authentic. That is: Be Yourself. There are a number of benefits to being authentic. Here is just a short list to help motivate you towards a life (and career) that works for you. Everyone knows what you can and can't do. Your employees very quickly learn your strengths and weaknesses. They get to know what makes you happy and what drives you crazy. It is a terrible feeling to be expected to do or complete something that you are not sure you can do. This can cause undue and unnecessary stress. Wh

Positive thinking is a mental and emotional attitude that focuses on the bright side of life and expects positive results. A person with positive thinking anticipates happiness, health and success, and believes that he or she can overcome any obstacle and difficulty. Positive thinking is not a concept that everyone believes and follows. Some, consider it as nonsense, and scoff at people who follow it. However, there is a growing number of people, who accept positive thinking as a fact, and believe in its effectiveness. It seems that this subject is gaining popularity, as evidenced by the many books, lectures and courses about it. To use it in your life, you need more than just to be aware of its existence. You need to adopt the attitude of positive thinking in everything you do.   How Positive Thinking Works The following story illustrates how this power works: Allan applied for a new job, but he didn't believe he will get it, since his self-esteem was low, and he considered h

Likeable people have an aura of confidence and joyfulness. They are always smiling. These folks don’t carry the world on their shoulders or have anything that forces negativity when they are in your presence. Their behavior is easy. But, what makes a person likeable? What attracts us to them? Here are 6 behaviors that make people like you more:   1. They want nothing in return. Likeable people genuinely ask for nothing. They sit with you, share over a cup of coffee, and engage in a conversation. They make eye contact. They smile. They truly don’t want anything but being with you. The likeable individual places you in the moment. Author Toni Morrison shared with Oprah many years ago in an interview, that one of the most important aspects that we have in our possession is the art of being present with anyone. If someone walks into the room, give that person your attention. Likeable people have this ability to put whomever is around them first and foremost for attention. They want

The Power of Words Have you ever stopped to think about how well phrases have stood the test of time? Have you ever used one or more of the phrases, “As my _____ used to say,” “In the words of ______,” or “_____ once said” before following up with a quote? How about having one or more quotes that you remember and recite? (Please share!) Words of the greatest Presidents, athletes, scientists, artists, and philosophers are forever engraved. Why is this? Because all of us need a source of inspiration. We look to the great minds of history with the hope of shaping the present and future. This segues into today’s topic: quotes that inspire strength during relationships. Here are 11 such quotes: 1. “There is no challenge strong enough to destroy your marriage as long as you are both willing to stop fighting against each other, and start fighting for each other.” – Dave Willis Mr. Willis makes an excellent point. When we’re heated with our partner, our natural tendency is to put up a de

The Ole’ New Years Resolution It doesn’t matter your occupation, obstacles, or goals. If you want to be a better, happier, and more successful person in the New Year, it is essential to (a) prioritize and (b) put in the effort. The New Years Resolution is a well-known tradition in the United States. It’s also a tradition that over 90 percent of people fail. This isn’t because people aren’t well-intentioned, it’s because they’re human! Ok, there’s more to this – and we’ll discuss things in a bit more detail later. It’s painless to spout off a tear-jerking resolution when you’ve put away six vodka martinis and a pound of guacamole dip. It’s hard when you (grudgingly) wake up the next morning and realize it’s time to get to work! To start off, we’ve got some good news, and we’ve got some bad news. Nobody ever wants the good news to be spoiled by the bad, so we’re going to pour in the salt early. (Please don’t shoot the messenger.) In a 1,129 person survey, just over 9 percent of respo

“We act how we think and feel. When we remove the negative thought, with it goes the drama and pain.” – Anon. Negative thoughts serve absolutely no purpose. Zero. None. Not-a-one. Know what else? Negative thinking has absolutely nothing to do with you as a person. Toxic thoughts don’t define your character, and they can’t determine your destiny. We determine the power of each negative thought. Unfortunately, we often grant negative thoughts too much influence – and this is what causes damage. The Buddha once said: “Your worst enemy cannot harm you as much as your own unguarded thoughts.” Notice the word unguarded in Buddha’s teaching. As he is with most things pertaining to the mind, Buddha is once again supremely wise. Sometimes negative thoughts have a tendency to hang around – this is when cognitive reframing (i.e. ‘cognitive restructuring’) is essential. Dr. Alice Boyes, a former clinical psychologist and author of The Anxiety Toolkit, describes cognitive restructuring as “a c

Depression, anxiety, and mental health in general have been a hot topic of discussion in recent times, and for good reason. By being vocal about mental illness, people can see that they are not alone, that others suffer just as they do. Being open about mental health allows people to come together and talk about how they feel, and discuss possible solutions. Depression is not something that you can just put a Band-Aid on and call it a day; it requires sometimes years of treatment and soul-searching to cure, and even then, a person may just learn to live with it. It’s a soul-sucking disorder that psychologists and doctors are still trying to understand. However, what makes the disorder even more difficult to live with is the constant shame and judgment people cast upon those suffering, as if they don’t have enough on their plate to deal with. Because of the stigma surrounding mental illness, or out of embarrassment, many people choose to bottle up their feelings rather than admit th

“Self-care is never a selfish act – it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer others. Anytime we can listen to true self and give the care it requires, we do it not only for ourselves, but for the many others whose lives we touch.”  – Parker J. Palmer By simply being alive, we must take care of ourselves first. This isn’t selfish; it’s an act of survival. If we don’t look after both our basic and more complex needs, who will? We must live with ourselves our entire lives, so we have no choice but to do whatever is necessary to keep ourselves afloat. However, life is more than just surviving; it’s also about thriving. It’s about taking time for yourself to figure out what you enjoy, and building a life that you can be proud of. Sadly, too many people are living well below their potential, or living for someone else besides themselves. You deserve to be a little selfish this year and put yourself first for a change. We’ll explain how